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Conspiracy Theorist Convinces Neil Armstrong Moon Landing Was Faked

Apollo 11 mission commander and famed astronaut Neil Armstrong shocked reporters at a press conference Monday, announcing he had been convinced that his historic first step on the moon was part of an elaborate hoax orchestrated by the United States government.

According to Armstrong, he was forced to reconsider every single detail of the monumental journey after watching a few persuasive YouTube videos, and reading several blog posts on conspiracy theorist Ralph Coleman’s website, OmissionControl.org.

“It only took a few hastily written paragraphs published by this passionate denier of mankind’s so-called ‘greatest technological achievement’ for me to realize I had been living a lie, ” said a visibly emotional Armstrong, addressing reporters at his home. “It has become painfully clear to me that on July 20, 1969, the Lunar Module under the control of my crew did not in fact travel 250,000 miles over eight days, touch down on the moon, and perform various experiments, ushering in a new era for humanity. Instead, the entire thing was filmed on a soundstage, most likely in New Mexico.”

“This is the only logical interpretation of the numerous inconsistencies in the grainy, 40-year-old footage,” Armstrong added.

Although Armstrong said he “could have sworn” he felt the effects of zero gravity while soaring out of the Earth’s atmosphere and through space, he now believed his memory must be flawed. He also admitted feeling “ashamed” that he had failed to notice the rippling of the American flag he and Buzz Aldrin planted on the surface, blaming his lack of awareness on the bulkiness of the spacesuit and his excitement about traveling to the “moon.”

“That rippling is not possible in the vacuum of space,” Armstrong said. “It must have been the wind from an air-conditioning duct that I didn’t recognize because you can’t hear a damn thing inside those helmets.”

“This is all just common sense, people,” he added. “It’s the moon. You can’t land on the moon.”

via onion news

LOL

14 September 2009 • conspiracy fake moon nasa neil armstrong ralph coleman satire moon landing

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uncertaintimes:

In August 1968 the Spanish government imprisoned a man on the island of Ibiza for creating a long series of sketches and paintings — beautiful, intensely lyrical works that Art Experts had universally proclaimed as masterpieces.

The imprisonment of this Maker of Masterpieces did not represent censorship in the ordinary erotic or religious sense. Nobody even accused the artist of Political Incorrectness. He got jugged for a technical matter — namely, that he had signed the wrong name to his works… or several wrong names, in fact. Names like Picasso and Van Gogh and Modigliani and Matisse, for instance….

In fact, Fake! says Elmyr had painted over a thousand of the classics of modern art. Every time you walk through a museum and see a Picasso or a Matisse that you particularly like, you should stop and ask, “Now did Picasso or Matisse do that, or did Elmyr do it?” Sort of changes your whole view of what critics call “the canon,” doesn’t it?…

We simply do not know the extent to which Elmyr has entered the canon. Maybe 2 per cent of the masterpieces in modern museums emanated from his wizard’s brush, as virtually everybody now admits. Maybe the figure (at least for post-impressionism, fauvism and early cubism, Elmyr’s specialities ) runs as high as 25 per cent, or 50 per cent…. An ouvre of “more than a thousand” paintings might make up something in that percentage range of canonical 20th Century Classics. These implications appear heavily suggested in Irving’s Fake! and even more stressed in the Welles-Reichenbach film….

— Robert Anton Wilson - Cosmic Trigger: Volume 3: My Life After Death - PAINTER JAILED FOR COMMITTING MASTERPIECES

Elmyr de Hory (wiki)

12 August 2009 • reblog: uncertaintimes • fake elmyr de hory

planettampon:

Scientology used a notable promotion in Sydney for many years, an “electronic talking billboard” a 33 metre high Volcano billboard situated in the main cinema district on George st. The Volcano billboard was “33 metres wide, 10 metres high and projects three-and-a-half-metres from the Metro’s facade. It is internally illuminated by 150 special display lamps synchronised to create a stylised simulation of lava flowing down the sides of the volcano. Each eruption heralds the screening of ads on the TV screen. Non-toxic smoke will spew from the crater at regular intervals.” The billboard was used to promote Dianetics books. It eventually fell into disuse, and was removed around 2000. [via]

Uh, awesome?

3 July 2009 • reblog: planettampon • electronic talking billboard scientology dianetics ron hubbard sidney volcano eruption fake

annarellix:

Hitler finds out Michael Jackson has died. (via stubod2001)

1 July 2009 • reblog: annarellix • parody fake michael jackson adolf hitler

Qualcosa però, durante l’intervento effettuato il 20 maggio dal dottor Massimo Boffini, va storto. Secondo l’accusa il chirurgo commette un errore che si rivelerà fatale: occlude il tronco comune della coronaria sinistra provocando così un infarto del miocardio. Il team però si accorge del danno fatto soltanto tre giorni dopo quando ormai l’elettroencefalogramma rivela che Pasqualina Amodeo è clinicamente morta. Stando a quanto raccolto dagli investigatori dei carabinieri Nas è a questo punto che interviene il professor Mauro Rinaldi, effettuando il 27 maggio un trapianto di cuore alla paziente. Trapianto che avrebbe avuto un unico scopo: espiantare il “vecchio” cuore per far sparire l’endoprotesi impiantata con il primo intervento e che sarebbe stata causa dell’infarto miocardico. In effetti il cuore espiantato è stato ritrovato nel reparto di Anatomia Patologica. L’endoprotesi invece è misteriosamente scomparsa. via errore fatale in sala operatoria un trapianto “finto” per coprirlo

30 June 2009 • cuore cinismo medicina trapianto fake